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Post by Rosie on Sept 19, 2005 17:28:09 GMT
Hello all, thought id have a go at writing up our story so far so we can see how its going with out going through all 81 pages!!! As its so long i'll do it in installations! This is from pages one to either nine or ten, so if anyone wants to continue it they can! Here goes, it doesn't make much sense: It was a sunny day and all was quiet in milky way land when suddenly Jacks kidnapped Karl Beattie and took him and her bunny to her secret den where she locked the doors and tied him to the bed. Once they were alone Jacks said "right this might hurt a bit". She went over to the fridge and took out a large cold bottle of carrot juice, she then slowly unscrewed the lid and poured it over the bunny. Then Jackie took off Karl's shirt and wrapped it around her. Then it was off with his chest hair wig, which he'd bought that day from his friend Jon Dibley, who didn't need to use it until he bought some grapes, which he tasted to make sure they were nice and fresh, not rank and smelly. Once checked Jon helped Karl catch Lou and drag her into the bedroom where they ate the contents of the mini fridge, leaving only a pickle which Jackie gave to her Bunny! However the bunny had Diarrhea, so Jackie took it to the vet for a check up and found that it had swallowed a small fridge magnet of Derek Acorah, which was stuck in the poor bunny's foot. The bunny started to run towards the light but it was not dead so it decided to find a big juicy carrot to share with David Wells who had joined the rabbit in a small box which they got from Asda. David Wells munched in munchies which he refused to enjoy, while the bunny bit through the box, escaping to the outside world where he tipped carrot juice over the mh team and ran into Stuart who likes bunnies. Stu picked up the bunny and ate it all up quickly; but along came Derek who 'picked up' on the bunnies and then got dragged away by Jon and Stuart who kicked Richard Felix because he told Karl where he kept hid lunch box. It was bright green and had little pics of the telletubbies on which was his favourite. His favourite was tinky winky and he was also partial to whats the story balamory?! He kept it secret by giving his little stash to his kids, twas a sneaky plan. Karl's secret was safe until he wore that silly suit and then while out bumped into Derek who was struggling in his highheels. "I'll swap ya" said Karl. "fair enough, but you had better take the nogs off". It was an inspirational journey, Karl struggling in high heels didn't reach the lamp post. Dibbers came along and took a photo of Karl, wearing nothing but a thong and a very big smile, and two red bull cans stuck down his pants. Embarrased he covers his embarrasment with his great big fig leaf that began to shrink until it was no longer covering his very big and good looking face, which was all red and sweaty in the heat. Talking of sweaty... along came the juice in a glass from Dibbers. He began to drink it until Stu came and stole it. Then he passed it to Yvette who decided to keep it until she poured it over Karl and so he cooled down. Then he walked towards Yvette to kiss her and say i love you awww. Yvette squeezed him tight and Stu said hang on, wait till you get home then you can ravish her! They all laughed and said lets have a nice cuppa! and then go ghost hunting! As they drove up the bumpy highstreet they saw a dark shadow and an orb. Yvette said "did you see that?". Omg its the ghost of a headless stripper!!! Just then Derek went into a trance and started to gyrate and take off his jacket and black leather thong! He began to walk unsteadily towards the stage looking for Sam to help, when he tripped on his heels and bumped his head on caths hairdryer and landed in her big pile of fab wigs...
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Post by emmarudd on Sept 19, 2005 22:11:24 GMT
He said "Can i try” No, bugger off" said Cath.. "Go on Cath", said Karl he would look really fab ! So Derek chose a wig and started to put it on Karl, Karl was quite pleased with the look, he spotted a "Chest Hair" wig.. And said to Yvette try this on, with that Yvette put it on her chest! Karl ripped it off with his teeth and began to run after dibbers but he tripped and fell in a large puddle and had to change into his swimming thong ... Yvette gasped "You've put it in the wrong place it goes in the electric socket. just then they saw a huge spaceship come down fast from Derek’s cloud of green gas.. On board Derek saw some little bunnies... or were they? orbs shining in the moonlight NO, in fact they were great big balls of fire which came down on Richards shiny new history book and it was the curse of.. the Richard and Richard history ... ' yikes ' cried Yvette and just ran in the other direction when suddenly a blast of cold air came in from the door and it was David Wells sneezing very hard but as he sneezed the.. snot came out all over mean while back with Yvette.. Derek was trying to put on three day old underwear when a weird smell wafted around and a very embarrassed Derek apologized to the crew and said that it must of been someone else as he backed out the door with... his tail between his legs Yvette is in pain after... pulling off the chest wig so that she could give it to Stuart for his butt, just then along came.. Richard who declares that it is infact a history piece that dates back hundreds of years to the Tudor times so ciaron says that Richard had to pass it to Karl to put away safely, when a gust of wind blew the wig out of sight and straight onto Stuart’s head What do you think" said Stu, rather fancy myself now... "Do you fancy me too"? ooohh def said cath, and swooning... she grabbed Stuart and... gave him a great big............ kiss on the lips, then Stu grabbed Cath and gave her the wig back, suddenly... a small black rat ran and crawled up David’s leg he jumped and screamed with pain as the rat had nibbled on his nobbles, they.. left some teeth marks and Cath said "Would you like. some cream on that mate? And David was not amused... so he went over to Karl and stuffed the rat down Karl’s jeans, "ouch that is... ‘My bits leave em alone’ Yvette said "Hey leave Karl’s..
this is to page 15 (i think)
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Post by Rosie on Sept 21, 2005 12:40:12 GMT
...bits, go and nibble Jon's"..."ok" said David, "Jon come here now!!!"...Jon was bit hard on his left arm and had to go to A+E where he was seen by a psychic nurse who said to him "i think you have been possesed by a wild dog. You need Derek's help to knock that light off!" because just then there was a giant clap of thunder in the air and they all looked in horror at the sky as there were bunnies falling down everywhere. "Omg" cried Richard! "those bunnies are going to eat us alive!!!" Shouted Stu. They all ran for cover and squeezed into Karl's car and locked the doors. Yvette looked up in horror, and then Karl started the engine and a ghost came out of the exhaust pipe. Karl said "quick cameras everyone", so the crew grabbed thier bits and started to film this white mist...it then went towards Cath who said "Oh Stu hold me, im scared!"..."So am i" said Stu "Come on Karl, give us a cuddle!"..."on your bike" said Karl..."I love Yvette". Just then the ghost attacked Cath and Stu...Karl karate chooped the ghost, which went flying towards Richard who ducked and the ghost banged into Jon who went flying with Derek into the mud...Yvette wet herself laughing, and then realised that Derek was no where to be seen...Yvette said "I need clean panties! Karl sweetie will you get me some clean paqnties, and help me get these smelly ones off?"...Tearing with his teeth at Yvette's knickers. Yvette giggled and David said "can't you two do that elsewhere?"... Karl said "oh sorry mate" and then the crew headed back to look for Derek who went to the park..."lets go on the swings, then play on the roundabout, and spin so fast that we all fall off onto some stinging nettles"...."arrrrgggggh my backside" shouted Stu "It hurts!!!"..."Don't worry Stu" said Cath "Ive some cream for that"..."thanks" said Stu "Rub it just behind you're knees and wait for Derek to say 'No Sam, watch no touchy'"..."Jusat rub it in!!!" screamed Stu, as a giant orb circled........................ This is from pages 16-20!!! Enjoy!!! ;D
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Post by Rosie on Sept 22, 2005 16:48:01 GMT
...overhead. Yvette pointed and screamed and couldn't quite believe her eyes, as the orb started to land on Stu's head, who started to kiss her all over her right foot! "Hey get off" shouted Yvette. "Karl is the only lover for me!!!".... Then Derek appeared wearing nothing but a diamond studded thong, which glowed in the dark...."aaaarrrrggggghhhhh" Cath said. "Omg that's what the orb was!!"...With that the team got back in Karl's car and tried to drive off.........but Derek had poured his ale into the petrol tank!...."oh f**k" said Karl. "Call the cops!" ......"No" said Derek. "Sam told me to do it honest"....."now now Derek" said Karl. "Do you listen to everything that Sam tells you to? Your little friend says jump, do you jump everytime?......"Sorry Karl" said Derek. "How can i make up for it?"......."Now let me see" said Karl. "Yvette, what can Derek do?"......"We can do with a back massage"......."No Yvette, im not letting Derek touch you while hes wearing that thong, it might give people the wrong impression"......"No Karl" said Yvette. "I meant for you to give me a back massage, like that time in Venice! Pleeeeease!"......."of course i will" said Karl smiling. "Come into the back of the car and take off yourr shoes. I just love you with your shoes off!! Now take the towel and lie on it face down and ill straddle, using some of Cath's hidden hairbrushes to stroke you. Does that feel Ok Yvette?"......ooooooooo yes, thats bliss Karl! Do it a bit harder!"......"im going as hard as i can sweetheart"....."i know" said Yvette. "i can feel that now darling...you are good"....."i know i am darling"....just then a knock on the car was heard...."oh no" siad Yvette....... "it must be Derek wanting to get one himself from you" said Karl......."Well he aint having one. This brush aint up for doing that for him. I may have to use a whip"........"Yeeeeeaaahhhhh hhhhhaaaaaaa ride em cowboy".....And so Yvette uses the whip to send Derek into a frenzy where he rips off his shirt to reveal his sparkly thong and diamond studded belly piercing, with his secret tatoo of Simon that is revealled to the whole.....................
From pages 21-25 of the add a line story! ;D
xxx
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leah
Full Member
Cinderella's Downfall
Posts: 1,223
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Post by leah on Oct 7, 2005 14:38:39 GMT
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Post by angel2 on Oct 7, 2005 16:48:38 GMT
excellent rosie and emma !!!
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Post by strauss on Oct 7, 2005 18:04:40 GMT
Thankyou Rosie and Emma.xx
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Post by Emma-lou on Oct 12, 2005 11:18:28 GMT
and then gyrates his hips car park? and to his.. Yvette screamed "Oh my god" and said ' derek put it .... away it not that big, not as big as Karl's diamond thongs and his look said it all, " I can't believe you said that , I thought Gwen said it was really nice, she persuaded me to buy it and wear it, do you all like wearing thongs? stuart said he had a real fur one which makes all the ladies Swoon, leaving them wanting more.. and more of Stu, in his fur thong, just then Derek shouted from behind the car, ' this belongs to me ' and everyone thought omg what is he on about, that is godfrey parks who possesses derek sometimes, i think that the fur thong belongs to godfrey and he wants it so stu threw it towards derek who immediately ran off to the bushes to put the thong on, derek reamerged with it on back to show everyone his manly body and with that derek suddenly realised that he was no front to his thong, it had been ripped off by cath, as she ran past him and she had it in in her teeth ! to dereks amazement he smiled at cath and cath said no, no, i thought this was Iain's so with her red face she turned and ran back to the others who were laughing uncontrollably, Yvette said "Well Cath, what did you think of Derek", "Did he have big thong like my karl ? "Well let's just say I needed to put my glasses on first Yvette", laughed Cath. "Well Cath you definately wouldn't need glasses for my Karl" blushed Yvette, "If you know......... what i mean". Just then.................... Derek ran back to the car to try to cover up his parts ! and he opened the car door to grab his coat, just then stu fell down a pot hole as it was very dark and the crew looked for him but 1 by 1 they each fell down the they to disappeared into the hole, they all got up dazed and when they looked around and saw the most magnificent bright orbs they had ever seen, just then a loud bang made them all leap 10ft in the air
Pages 26 to 30
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Post by Jacks on Oct 12, 2005 11:46:20 GMT
at this story !!!
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Post by Rosie on Oct 12, 2005 13:43:58 GMT
lol its gonna take a while, but it saves reading through all the hundreds of pages on the other thread
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Post by Melz on Oct 14, 2005 15:10:32 GMT
Pg 31 – 40 inc. Yvette said, "Did you see............. that it was sam, dereks guide, he says there is immeniant danger, we must be very careful, karl where are you, asked yvette, omg I cant find him anywhere, Yvette started to cry, stu said can't see you Karl, Karl he must be here somewhere Yvie needs you she is he had vanished, nowhere to really upset mate, where are be seen. yvette ran off and the rest of the . . . . omg i can't find Karl someone help me wheres Karl? the crew went in search of Karl, but couldn't find him anywhere, Yvie was devastated him anywhere, suddenly they spotted Karls camera in the corner and thought he must be there somewhere, then they found Karls shoe next to the camera and poor evvie began to laugh! where's the silly sweetie gone, then they heard a faint cry in the corner, they ran over to see if he was there it was all dark and a loud voice said ......BOO !!!!!!! Karl, oh Karl you are Stuart shouted Yvette needs u Where is she Stu, I can't see her, shes over here Karl, she is a little upset, she thought she had lost you, Yvette said oh my darling i have never been so scared, are been looking, come here and give us a quick snog !!!!! They went into the corner and had a lovely snog im so glad i married you , said yvette, me too said karl.....come on said said karl.....come on said bedroom over here, i need to feel you close to me, okay, said Karl, I will just......omg he cried that was jon, he is coming up the stairs, quick lets pretend we have seen a dark figure and we can go and hide in the wardrobe, just then a dark figure did burst through the door and opened the wardrobe door, karl and Yvette both screamed as it wasn’t jon, it was a hooded monk ! the monk grabbed them and demanded his fur thong back Derek ran towards them and swiped the red thong and put it over his head started to dance around and then fell to the floor in fits of laughter... then cath said omg what are you doing ? they are mine..... let me have them back i need them for the cake that i plan to... surprise Stu with for his birthday party, and yvette will bring karl in his costume, to wear he is dressing up as a giant orb !! wow... he will look glowing in that illuminous blue/white suit you know the one he wore on our wedding night.... WOW! yes our wedding night! as yvette dreamed away, the clock ticked and yvette realised she was going to be late so she grabbed karl and the outfit and ran to the car, get in Karl we are so late, u will have to get changed whilst i drive sweetheart, so i will put my foot down, just then a police car pulled up alongside their car and asked why Yvette Karl was naked in the back of the car, Yvette tried to explain that they were going to a fancy dress party, but the officer wouldn't listen and insisted on taking poor Karl down to the police station for questioning just then David Wells appeared and asked the spirits for some help, just then a plane flew by which gave Karl the chance to escape the plane hoisted down a rope ladder and karl climbed up it, still naked and managed to get into the plane, and he had very very,very,very,very sore................. hands from where he was climbing the rope, he also nearly slipped and fell from the ladder but his spirit was high as he had a few shots of vodka he managed to get in the helicopter with yvette screaming hold me tight Karl, i'm gonna fall! no i wouldn't let you go normally, but my hands are so sore and red. Sweetheart, hold onto my............ Leg, hey I said leg not my c$%k!! i know They are close together but, at this moment Yvette sneezed which meant she couldn't hang on any longer, she slipped and started falling, Karl stood and then jumped and grabbed Yvettes arm, he pulled her back into the helicopter, and said phew that was close. At that point, Stuart who was watching from the ground Wiped his sweaty brow,and said ' blimey that karl should ... of been a superhero !! All of a sudden, the helicopter . . . . . . . this is a cracking story so far
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